so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
