Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
