Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
