You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
