Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
