oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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