If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
