someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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