There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
2020 sucks, I want a refund
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
