Having a random hookup so left but love u
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
