He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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