never play flip cup with pint glasses
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
