He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
NoShamevember. You game?
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
