he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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