do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
