READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
