you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
he fucked my hip out of place.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
