Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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