Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
