Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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