she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Randomize
