We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Blood and glitter go together right?
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
