I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Randomize
