The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
