ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
