The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize
