This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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