no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Randomize
