so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
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