After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
