Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
