Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize