If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
