it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Brb crying the tears of my youth
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
