ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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