Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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