So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize