I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
