he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
