Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
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