3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
