If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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