his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
