u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
