i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
