Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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