That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
