No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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