Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
