Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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