I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
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