her vagine was all disorganized.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Randomize
